Anyway, I have a lot of news to report. Some of it is shocking, so I'll just jump right in. I'm two and a half months pregnant! It was unexpected, but definitely not unwanted. I had always assumed I didn't want to be a mother and that it would likely not happen to me, but when it did happen, I was nothing but happy.

I've already been to a couple of doctor's appointments. I love my doctor, by the way. She is very nice and patient. She did an ultrasound on my first visit, so I got to see the baby at about eight weeks. It looked like a real baby - only tiny! It didn't seem real until I saw it floating around. She said it has a strong heartbeat. I don't get my "real" ultrasound until the end of May. That's when I should find out the gender. Heck yes I want to find out ahead of time. Evrything else will be a surprise: what the baby will look like, how it will act, and how it will feel to be a mother. I want to know its gender. A part of me is hoping for a girl, but I just want it to come to term and be healthy. I'll take whatever God gives me.

Now what you may be wondering is "if she's pregnant, who's the father?" That would be my boyfriend, Sean. He and I have been living together for several months. Things have happened quickly, which is very uncharacteristic of me. I have kept most guys at bay, or at least from getting too close, for years. With him, it always seemed natural. We are very similar im personality and temperament. It is good to finally have a man who can stand up to me, but it does cause its problems. I am used to being in charge, as is he. Neither one of us is going to have that role, here, so it's a stressful dance sometimes. Right now we're working on figuring out how to become our own little family. It would be nice if it worked out in the long-term, but I am not a romantic nor a dreamer. Sometimes life doesn't work out that way. We'll see.

Sean's very thrilled about the baby, though. He went to my first appointment with me and was jumping up and down when he saw the ultrasound. He sent the picture to all his friends and family and tells everyone he meets "I'm going to be a daddy." He wants to marry me and take me back to NYC with him. We'll see.

Everything else is about the same. Well, not quite. I stepped down from my teaching job, only to come back as a reading resource teacher. I'm paid less, but I like it so much more. I feel like I'm actually helping the kids, but I'm going at a much slower pace and I don't have to deal with the planning, grading, conferencing, and other such bullshit that eats up most of teachers time. Not sure what I'll do for next year, but I'm doing this and tutoring til the end of this year.

Spring Break is coming up, so I'm hoping to visit my mom in Portland and my grandparents in Bakersfield. However, I'm not paid for Spring Break, so I may want to stay and work at the tutoring center as much as a I can. I didn't have a Christmas break, so I really want this one. It's a conundrum. Oh well; I'll figure it out.

That's about all for now. I'm going to go try to distract myself from this constant "morning, noon, and night sickness," and from the fact that I'm getting fat very quickly. Pregnancy can be a beautiful thing, but it can also suck. Siiiigh. More later!

Anne